*All your conversations start with “One time at Disney . . .”

*You never point with one finger.

*You’ve worked with or lived with people from every state and at least 5 other countries.

*You know where all of your friends are every Monday night.

*You know that “my Friday” could easily fall on a Tuesday (and it probably does).

*Wendy’s, Taco Bell, Earl of Sandwich… enough said.

*You can calmly say “Yes, the wait really is 30 minutes” 50 times within 10 minutes.

*You know what an alpha-unit is.

*You know what a protein spill is, and you can smell Voban from 50 feet away.

*You speak fluent ‘radio’: 101, 102, 103, 56, 10-4, 10-9 . . .

*You know where someone can find any Disney character at any time (or at least CHIP knows).

*You know what CHIP is.

*You never wait for more than 10 minutes for any attraction.

*Anything heartwarming that happens is now a “Magical Moment.”

*You can spot a hidden Mickey anywhere.

*You regret not having a FastPass every time you have to wait in a line.

*You know it’s a costume, not a uniform.

*You can spot a Mickey antennae on any car that is a mile away.

*You can recite preshows and even entire attraction spiels without even thinking about it.

*You have saved a baby elephant from deadly poachers several times.

*You use the following terms in normal conversation: ADO, ER, MK, the tunnels, DAK, PI, Vista, Commons, Chatham forgetting that no one has a clue what you’re talking about.

*You start friendly conversations with complete strangers.

*You know how to perfectly plan your day so that you can see both Illuminations and Wishes.

*You avoid skipping anything more than 3 days in a row and 9 times in 90 days for fear of being kicked out.

*Anytime you go anywhere you wonder what the story is behind the particular place.

*”The Man” now becomes “The Mouse”.

*You know the colors of all the Monorails.

*Any WDW commercial brings a tear to your eyes.

*You know that one of the nighttime shows that is impossible to miss is the “Stroller Races down Main Street”.

*You have the overwhelming urge to offer to take people’s pictures.

*You know how to smile and politely answer the question “Why is it raining?”

*You think nothing of walking up to lost people and offering directions.

*You can spend a day at WDW without going on any rides and you still have the time of your life.

*You have seen the backside of water.

*Guests ask you for directions… when you aren’t in costume.

*You can speak Spanish…or at the least the Spanish part of the monorail. “Por favor mantengase alejado de las puertas.”

*You know what “EPCOT” stands for.

*It’s not unusual to have lunch at a pub in England and have dinner at a sushi bar in Japan and stop at Norway for a quick dessert.

* You can drive a Pargo like a race car.

* You use doors that open “Automagically.”

* You know that Ghiardelli’s gives away free chocolate…and you have a hat to get that second piece…

*You know how to answer the question “Do you know what time the 3 o’clock parade is?”

*You know where all the dirty references are in each and every disney movie!!

*Not “customers”, but “guests.”

*You know what it is like to actually “live” where you work.

*When the mouse becomes the rat.

*When all customer service sucks outside.